I recently went through a painful breakup with my fiancée of four years. Because of the split, we had to cancel our BTO flat application in Tampines. After all the administrative forfeitures, my share of the refunded downpayment came back to about S$22,000.
I was already devastated about the relationship ending, and this money was just a sad reminder of my ruined future. But before the bank transfer even cleared, my mother called me into the living room. She told me she knew I was getting the BTO refund back.
Then she dropped a bomb on me. She demanded that I give S$15,000 of my refund directly to my older brother. My brother is 31 years old and has not held a stable job for the last two years.
He spends most of his time playing computer games in his room and complaining that the Singapore job market is too tough. My mother explained that my brother desperately needs a new high end gaming laptop to start doing freelance graphic design. She also said he is very stressed from staying at home so much, so she wants to use the rest of the S$15,000 to sponsor a solo trip to Japan for him to clear his mind.
I was completely speechless. This is my hard earned money that I saved up for years to build a life with my ex fiancée. When I told my mother no, she started crying and accusing me of being selfish.
She said that since I am single now, I have no immediate need for a house or a family, so I do not need so much cash sitting in my bank account. She even said that as the younger brother, I should support my family instead of hoarding my savings.
My brother is now ignoring me at home, and my mother refuses to cook my dinner or talk to me unless I agree to the bank transfer. I feel like a stranger in my own home just because I want to keep my own money.
Should I stand my ground and move out, or should I just give them the money to keep the peace at home
What would you do if your partner hid something this important from you?
